I’m not sure, since I haven’t been to bed yet. Remember yesterday? I wrote about “overcommitting” myself? I just finished that powerpoint (it’s 4:45 am) and it’s still not “perfect”…but my eyes are crossing and I have double vision, so it’s time to quit. I have to deliver it in an hour and a half, so no use going to bed.
With the help of a pot of coffee and the Lord, I should be able to make it through. But still, if you hear a really loud crash around 4:30 in the afternoon, don’t worry, it’s just me falling face first again.
I’m so clumsy lately…and I’m not even pregnant. Three weeks ago, I dove face first off the platform at church after singing (caught myself, thank-you-very-much) and twisted the fooey out of my ankle. I really wish you could have seen it. It was a spectacular save, though – right out of the Guiness Book of world records under “woman holds record for doing triple kow tow off church’s platform while twisting ankle and somehow manages to avoid the pianist and the old fashioned alters”. It was quite a feat. I even threw my hands up like Mary Lou Retton in the 1984 Olympics when I was done just so everyone would know how proud I was that I saved it and didn’t hit the floor, which prompted the entire front row to hold up placards reading “10”. Well, I’m just kidding about that last part, but I did hold up my hands and throw my hip out in a pathetic attempt to save face. (like there was any face left to be saving)
Then this past Saturday, I wore a pair of dress pants backwards all day. To the mall. Shopping in Dillards. My friend swears she didn’t notice, but I’m wondering how anyone could miss the fact that my front was all baggy because that’s where my tushy normally goes? I don’t know…thankfully, I was wearing a shirt jacket that pretty much covered it up. Why didn’t I notice, you ask? Well, to be honest, the pants were the kind that zip in the back and being a stay at home mom who’s all hip and cool (not), I kind of forgot about the back zipper. I thought they felt funny when I put them on (and I certainly wondered why there was a clasp and not a button?), but I was in a hurry and didn’t pay too much attention. Don’t you just wish you lived near me so you could laugh at my stupidity on a daily basis?
Of course, if you made it this far, or read my blog for very long, chances are you have laughed at my stupidity…because who needs kids to laugh at when I can make fun of myself?
My kids have been extraordinarily funny of late, but right now I’ll be darned if I can recall one thing to recount for you. I’ll have to sleep on it and get back to you. And Megan wants to know about my hair issues. Oh. my. lanta. I’ll definitely be posting on that…but tomorrow. ‘Cause I’m too worn out tonight. Or this morning….or whatever it is. *yawn* Catch ya on the flip side.
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