I found this today. Would you pay $399 for a universal remote? That’s how much this one costs! I mean, come on…don’t those people know it hones your parenting skills to keep track of all the remotes that come with your electronic devices? I like to think of remotes as being like my kids…the second you take your eye off of them, they go missing. It is a little known scientific fact (probably because I’m making this up as I go) that if you learn to keep up with your remotes, you will never, ever lose your kids when you are out shopping in a public place.

This is most definitely a product marketed for the SINGLE person: 1) They are the only ones with enough money to spend on something like this, and, 2) They are the only ones with enough time to figure out how the darn thing works. See, what the marketers don’t tell you is that it takes a Doctorate in Electronics Engineering with an emphasis in Thermonuclear Physics to understand the detailed instructions and binary codes that come with the thing. A substantial energy barrier (the fact that I didn’t get any sleep last night because my 3 year old did that freaky-stand-at-the-bedside-and-look-at-me-in-the-dark-thing) must be overcome before programming can occur — an unmarried person can stay up for days on end with the promise of a promotion at work and a little Starbucks.

My husband’s friend (who is single — what did I tell you?!) saw this remote in Best Buy the other day and was excitedly telling us about it — all the special features and advantages (trying to justify a purchase, no doubt), when my husband stopped him midsentence and said, “Look, for $399, it better have a feature that pauses my wife’s menstrual cycle and makes coffee in the mornings for me…otherwise, I’m not interested.”

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3 Comments on Are you even remotely interested?

  1. Ems
    September 27, 2007 at 12:18 am (10 years ago)

    399 for a remote? Maybe a remote and a flat screen TV! I liked your answer..hehe.

  2. Kim from Hiraeth
    September 27, 2007 at 6:11 am (10 years ago)

    Not remotely interested in the remote but thoroughly enjoyed the post.

    You have a funny husband. So do I. Isn’t it fun?

    : D

  3. Dana
    September 27, 2007 at 9:42 am (10 years ago)

    That sounds like something my husband would say! Seriously, $400 for a remote? I would say for that kind of money, it needs to be able to pause my husband before he says anything stupid!

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